Beyond The Illusions “Review”


Yes, the book is wacky but it is wonderful too. It took me a long time to finish. It was hard to read but I succeded to finish the book.

The work of the Nepali writer Sheeba Shivangani Shah is really appreciable. The novel however lacks many things. The main thing it lacks is the flow. (This might be my personal feeling). The language is too awkward too. Hard to understand and more than this hard to believe is the tantric practices.

Beyond the illusions is a novel which somehow makes you contemplate in the sense that it teaches us the way towards godhood and also urges us to find god within self. However the shocking evidences inside an ashram is hard to believe.

The writer has done a lot of hard work that is really appreciable. The hard work lies in providing us the truth of Tantric practices, the evidences and the real events. I read her interview as well and yes it is true the writer had really worked hard to bring this book.

The Novel is about the search for the true self, the god inside our soul within us, our own longing for the eternal truth, the bliss and the point of Nirvana. Bharavi, the protagonist happens to suffer so much and at the end she is able to find god within herself. The story blend of fact and fiction seems to be awesome but it is kind of soft porn, really hard to read and even sometimes unreadable.

The family tragedy at one place, the love and longing for a husband and the desire of wife and again the reversing story is wonderful. How Jayanta ( Bharavi’s Husband ) happens to leave his home in search of the Nirvana, and how Bharavi leaves her home to find and bring back Jayanta to the normal self but happens is just opposite, Bahravi finds out the Nirvana, who was never in search of it and Jayanta chooses normal Life in the end.

 I felt pang when I read about molestation and abuse of female body such that it sounds unnatural and totally unreadable and also that happening in Tantra, unimaginable. It was really hard to believe the sexual activities involved in tantra.

The character Sadashiva lacks poetic justice for he receives death untimely, with the hand of the same creator who had held his hands when he was helpless and had become his gaurdian, his Guru. There I felt, if Bharavi had the powers then she should have stopped Swami killing his own loved disciple and also the one who loved and cared Bhairavi like nothing.

Moreover I enjoyed reading. The things about Kali fascinated me like nothing. It was really nice to learn to find god within myself. We should really appreciate this book for what it is. It is nice to read ….I must say I enjoyed reading and when I finished reading I said to myself -: Thank God I could complete.

P.S. Happy reading


Finding Kali within Self

“A woman is the foundation of the world,

She is the true form of the body.

Whatever form she takes, is indeed the superior form.

There is not and has never been, nor will there be

Any holy yoga in comparison to woman,

No mystical formula or asceticism to match a woman.

There is not nor will there arr riches more valuable than woman”

I have been reading Sheeba Shivangangini Shah’s Beyond The illusion since many days. It is fascinating me a lot. However the book lacks so many things. It is really simple. I began reading other book The Namesake of Jhumpa Lahiri and thelanguage has a great flow. I am not undermining our own homeland writer but I think they need to learn a lot. I loved Samrat Upadhaya’s books..all of three and found them fascinating too. But this book is so much fascinating. It provides you many evidence to believe but it is quite strange.

So, I am fascinated because of the Tantra and Mantras , jadus and so many things in the book. But the most fascinating thing in the book for me happened the facts related to “kali” . I want to include the evidence I have heard , actually told by a friend -:

Parvati is called Kali because ,once she was having a bath in the Parvati Kund in the Himalayas with two of her sakhis.She lived a life of an ascetic even though she was married to Shiva because Shiva was always in Samadhi. So on that day she was having this bath and she was dreaming of her husband. In the dream she was making love to him and this became unbearable to the waters and herself too, this in turn turned the waters black and her body burnt with the fire of passion. So she too beacme black. And hence known as Kali”

But Kali is really furious god I assume. Furious of all. The wide stretched arms, wide open fiery eyes and her red toungue lolling out…She is Kali powerful of all..the strongest of all..She is Kali …the dreadful god…Fearful too.

I am in the middle of the book, and I found lord Kali fascinatingly portrayed in the book which has finally grabbed my feelings towards Kali. There is a small portrait of Kali in my home and I see it time and again to watch this furious get her strength , to be powerful, to be strong, to live life…To be her devotee.

Kali is the supreme power. The severest of all. Power to kill and give life. Power to enlighten and mesmerize.

I am mesmerized really…the black god…

I am trying to find her withing me. Where she resides, the book says. Either it is fiction, the accounts of Kali mata is really helping me to get energy from inside.I always undermine myself. I am so bad, I am so stupid but now not. Yes it is because of myself and also because of the book I am feeling that I am much more better. Its moreover because of Kali within me.

Yes, I am strong, yes Kali resides within me in my soul, in my heart, within me. I was unaware of my own capabilities. Yes the expedition, yes the haunt has begun to find Kali within me. I am hopeful to find her nowhere but within myself. I want to excavate her. I want to be her decent devotee. I want to find her out. Feel the power , show the power and feel the difference. Lets see where it takes me…

Here is the last line of the book -:

Indeed, in the beginning is Kali, in the end is Kali.

In between we remain mere illusionary phantoms

        of her divine inspiration.

Hope’s Alive Still – II


Always had belief there exists only Red Rose...

Always was supertious that the beauty lies only in the red one…

Always..thought the best one in the garden is only the red..

Red for passion…red…for the beauty of the whole garden


Then I noticed a strange Green Thing….the tiny leaves

Along with the red…

Red suggests blood…

Green the life..

Hard to realize…

Hard to believe..but I know it is indeed “Mandatory”

I need to live a life..either..there is this Dark side…

I know there exists a Dark Black rose…its natural…

I got enlightened to realize 

There are red,green and black rose

Red…for minute pleasure…green life and black sugessting death

What I want to chose…a pleasure that ends away in a few seconds..

Or what..the end the life…

No ++…NO…

Hope’s still alive…

I am choosing the Green for life…

For my life…it needs to move on…++…

For I want to live….

For this..Hope’s not dead yet…

Hope’s Alive still…..

A green Rose!!!!

I have never seen a green rose…roses are red ni hoina….( I have known that a black rose exists and a blue rose has been artificially produced somewhere in China or Japan ).

I wish I had known that there exists a green rose before….it would have given me hope that there are good people indeed.. ( Holmes there is god and he is great…so that he created such a beautiful thing A green Rose ). I think I will laughed out loud if I will ever get chance of seeing a  red rose because I am like this only…and I don’t know why I am like this.

A lot happens over a cup of coffee!!!!! indeed….

I wish to get the Green Rose not the leaves…but the leaves are beautiful indeed….( I collect the amazing leaves…but rarely do I keep them ). I have kept some of them….But these tiny green leaves of the amazing green rose I shall keep it for ever.

Guess what is in my bag….Beyond the illusions…by Sheeba Shivangini Shah….and who else than Milton to provide me with every book I want to read..he has been too generous…I am desperate to end the book(Not started yet ) …because I have been longing to read the book since I knew about its publication. ( Moreover because of Tantra Mantra in the book….which I really wonder….I wish I could learn these things…to spell a magic over someone…”secret hai”….)

A lot happens over a cup of Coffee….

I was searching for this “Green Rose” which I have never seen..I knew the roses are throny I never felt like picking one infact they look beautiful in the plant….( I never pick flowers and I hate who does that because flower’s right place is on the plant on which they grow..) Once I had been spellbound by the red rose..prettiest in the garden..and attracted by its beauty….I could not control myself…I went to pick it up….and guess what…My hands were bleeding..yes because of thrones…I could not pluck the rose and make it mine….to keep it forever…with me…But..I hadn’t realized that roses also had thrones..and the thrones attacked me and my hands were bleeding….it was so painful ..I thought that would kill me….So, roses reminded me of the pain I had felt that day….So, I have decided not to be spellbound for a second time….( Let me say just the red rose..I want to see a Green Rose…)

Green Rose….was indeed beautiful…I found it today..but Damn…only the leaves..I assume from the leaves that these roses are not throny…( right Holmes ). So, how does a green rose look like when it is on the plant…I am really longing to see this….

A lot happens over a cup of coffee…

It was indeed nice meeting…a cup of coffee…..I shall cherish it…A wonderful feeling I am feeling…but what…yeah..its not always…the samething…but sometimes..accidently…God gives a reason to smile…a reason to live a life…Life’s beautiful indeed….equally beautiful is the moment…to be cherish forever…..and yes the beautiful cup of coffee…..It was cold…..but not a cold coffee…

I seriously felt nothing special…No, my heart was not feeling palpitation.. it wasn’t trembling either..and my cheeks weren’t red….( Were they???), I didn’t had a fear…But I was happy that I had dared it for the second time…Perhaps because of fear only I was running away…I needed to dare…because I want to move on…The same place ..same cold be dranked with a pipe..( Yeah this time I finished…it…but I think I can’t digest it either…because I am prone to cold…)..

I am really sorry because I kept on telling abt me..but never asked…( I have been like this only either I keep quite and would not speak a word..ot else I can keep on talking….)

P.S. A green rose…a cup of coffee….something elusive…..Can someone tell me how to parcel..liquid….LOL