Comfortable Silences

Picture by Swapnil Acharya. Poem below is for the picture

Picture by Swapnil Acharya. Poem below is for the picture

Reflection of mine -you are

I fall for you not only once, Time and again

As, I feel you as me..

This feeling is Narcissus too

Worry not, I won’t kill myself.

You are that Mirage

Far far away

No, I don’t want to catch you

But I will love to sit back

Just to stare and watch you!

The Reciprocation of Life:

“See these clay pots, I simply love them”

“But I don’t, as they give pain when they break”

“These are not just made up of clay, these are made up of emotions, feelings, love and determination”

Comfortably silent we are now as we both stare and smile at the clay pots ruminating in our own worlds, holding up the words and keeping a mum. I love this comfortable silence we have between our discussions and the discourse full of affection. You know I love your smile that replaces speech, I love your lustrous radiant eyes that reflects your inner feelings, I love your long long breathe which gives me as sigh that you are actually enjoying this comfortable silence that we are having in between. Do you feel it? I equally enjoy this silence between us. I hold up the clay cup in which you are drinking your favorite Americano and I feel the warmth of it. There is a pleasure of holding the cup made by someone from a distant land whom with love and affection, care and determination gave shape to this China cup.  Do you know with our silent conversation you are shaping my thoughts with much feeling, emotions and installing determination in me, installing courage in me?

“Do you know you reciprocate life in everything?”

I am mute now. I don’t need to answer your query. You are the questioner and you are the answerer yourself. How you questioned and answered? How? I question myself. How witty one can be to give this feeling that is so personal to you only? More than a compliment, this is what I feel like is understanding or it is the comprehension of the depth of me. Do you know that sometimes, I feel you travel inside me, inside the nooks and corners of me and then study me silently? I find our talk lyrical sometimes. When you speak after a tranquil mum, I feel like it is a poetry that you just formed. And, I too try to answer you in verses trying to imitate your peculiar style. Then we start talking in poems. Whoa! We motion in poetries that we compose for each other and recite for each other. I am the lover of our lyrical silences – when you recite your poem and I sit back in comfortable silence and vice-versa. Do you know when you recite poems for me, I feel like you are squeezing my heart? I feel pain’s enormity that you needed to vent out and when I am not there you create it and give it the shape of a perfect poetry that motions. I feel the depth of agony that makes you write your poems. This is how I write. This is how you write. This is how we establish our communication heart to heart, mind-to-mind and soul-to-soul.

“Don’t lose yourself, hold yourself tight”

“You hold me tight please”

“Should I drink Coffee or Kill myself” (Quoting Albert Camus).

“Drink Coffee please, don’t even think of killing yourself, I know you can’t live without me, can you?”

“……”

You had probably understood my silence. With this thrilling question, a cool chill went down in my spine. I was uncomfortably silence that moment. I don’t know what to answer but my eyes were reflecting the turbulence that my heart was undergoing. Eyes started glittering with waters, shining with it. And you got your answer. I don’t have to voice my perception on any thing, it is understood. But sometimes it is misunderstood as well. Misunderstanding was also too cool. It was cool because it was the first heated discussion we had ever had and then it continued. I love this silence after heated conversation with you because I love to bug you and loved to be bugged by you too and keeping silence is bugging you and vice versa. I love the turning of my normal cheeks and to rosy as well as hot and I love the twinkling of eyes and thumping of this heart. But at the end Silence rocks… it brings us back to the same place where we enjoy our comfortable silences.

“You know you are absurd?”

“What???”

“Yes! Absurd”.

I wish I could go for the long walk to walk on and on silently – here and there holding our mood swings and talking absurd. We both faced same thing. We both are facing same existential crisis. We endure past, we endure present and we think of enduring till future. You know what? I loved the way we console each other showing us the same world with a different vision. I yearn for a walk of ours when we will pour ourselves and sometimes we can keep the sheer silence. Both will be equally powerful moments for me. We have this strong bond created knots after knots tying ourselves one after another in a strong bond. Do we know we have that gravitational force that we pull each other and we hold each other so tight that makes us exist? So tight that we never fall part. No, we are not the things that fall apart. We are buddies who equally with power inside hold each other so tight such that we exist. But you are a bigger planet and I am the smaller one. Your power towards me is always a little stronger than mine. And this will be always…

The reciprocation of life–

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11 Responses

  1. Abstract but wonderful – – I love “abstract” and that is why this piece is wonderful.

  2. Thank you for calling it wonderful.

  3. nice one………

  4. Thank you Beck 🙂

  5. Kati Khatra lekhna sakne hola. Uff!!! 😛 🙂

  6. Thank you Upashana 🙂

  7. simple wow !!! brilliant piece writing

  8. i missed “of” 😉

  9. Thank you Saroj 🙂 keep on reading me 😀

  10. was looking for some peace of mind. and i ended here. got what i wanted. it can only come from a beautiful soul. cheers 🙂

  11. Thank you so much Punjita for dropping by after so long… much love

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