Finding Kali within Self

“A woman is the foundation of the world,

She is the true form of the body.

Whatever form she takes, is indeed the superior form.

There is not and has never been, nor will there be

Any holy yoga in comparison to woman,

No mystical formula or asceticism to match a woman.

There is not nor will there arr riches more valuable than woman”

I have been reading Sheeba Shivangangini Shah’s Beyond The illusion since many days. It is fascinating me a lot. However the book lacks so many things. It is really simple. I began reading other book The Namesake of Jhumpa Lahiri and thelanguage has a great flow. I am not undermining our own homeland writer but I think they need to learn a lot. I loved Samrat Upadhaya’s books..all of three and found them fascinating too. But this book is so much fascinating. It provides you many evidence to believe but it is quite strange.

So, I am fascinated because of the Tantra and Mantras , jadus and so many things in the book. But the most fascinating thing in the book for me happened the facts related to “kali” . I want to include the evidence I have heard , actually told by a friend -:

Parvati is called Kali because ,once she was having a bath in the Parvati Kund in the Himalayas with two of her sakhis.She lived a life of an ascetic even though she was married to Shiva because Shiva was always in Samadhi. So on that day she was having this bath and she was dreaming of her husband. In the dream she was making love to him and this became unbearable to the waters and herself too, this in turn turned the waters black and her body burnt with the fire of passion. So she too beacme black. And hence known as Kali”

But Kali is really furious god I assume. Furious of all. The wide stretched arms, wide open fiery eyes and her red toungue lolling out…She is Kali powerful of all..the strongest of all..She is Kali …the dreadful god…Fearful too.

I am in the middle of the book, and I found lord Kali fascinatingly portrayed in the book which has finally grabbed my feelings towards Kali. There is a small portrait of Kali in my home and I see it time and again to watch this furious beauty..to get her strength , to be powerful, to be strong, to live life…To be her devotee.

Kali is the supreme power. The severest of all. Power to kill and give life. Power to enlighten and mesmerize.

I am mesmerized really…the black god…

I am trying to find her withing me. Where she resides, the book says. Either it is fiction, the accounts of Kali mata is really helping me to get energy from inside.I always undermine myself. I am so bad, I am so stupid but now not. Yes it is because of myself and also because of the book I am feeling that I am much more better. Its moreover because of Kali within me.

Yes, I am strong, yes Kali resides within me in my soul, in my heart, within me. I was unaware of my own capabilities. Yes the expedition, yes the haunt has begun to find Kali within me. I am hopeful to find her nowhere but within myself. I want to excavate her. I want to be her decent devotee. I want to find her out. Feel the power , show the power and feel the difference. Lets see where it takes me…

Here is the last line of the book -:

Indeed, in the beginning is Kali, in the end is Kali.

In between we remain mere illusionary phantoms

        of her divine inspiration.

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